something a little lighter :)

I did it! I finally bought the KRISTALLER chandelier at IKEA....a beautiful moment that I've been dreaming of for at least two years.

Thankfully, dear old dad helped install it, as IKEA's instructions were pretty opaque. One would think that any product which involved electrical wiring would at least merit a manual with written instructions, but no. Just six pages of standard IKEA pictorials in which one isn't entirely certain if the featured stick man is securing a lamp to the ceiling or assembling a bookshelf...no 23 year old girl should tackle that without a little help from her father.

Overall, I am completely, totally and fantastically in love with it. Its cheery sparkles are the perfect spring "accessory" for the home. :)

soft and gushy heart.

Sometimes you think you're being brave and fearless by allowing your heart to be unaffected by the past...by continuing to put it all out there....when infact you're just being silly. To fall back on an-oh-so-handy kitchen analogy: There's a reason why once you've learned that the stove is hot you're much more careful when you use it. Hearts and romance should be the same, yet unfortunately, I haven't quite made that connection. I tend to place my hand, palm side down, directly on the burner for several seconds...and continue to find myself wildly surprised when...(gasp!) it hurts. Then there I sit, with an enormous chai latte in hand, with one more person imprinted on my heart, and I not on theirs...just wondering where I went wrong.

I know I'm overly anxious for a sweet, God-loving man who so desires to know my heart the way I desire to know his. Somedays more than others, it just feels so endlessly far away. But I know that when I find that...if I should find that...it will be amazing. And, all this will make me appreciate him, whomever he is and wherever God has him, so very much more.

However, in the meantime, I am certain that when I arrive on a first date, I should be wrapped in that post-office tape that reads, "EXTREMELY FRAGILE! HANDLE WITH CARE." Perhaps this will draw the needed attention and care to my oh-so-delicate heart. :)

a rainy day.

There are two types of precipitation: flakes and drops. After five months of flakes, drops are deliriously delightful. Chilly, drizzly drops signal spring's commencement...a season free from mittens, frosty windshields and exorbitant heating bills.

Drops also bring a hope for sprouts and growth, and then...eventually color. And then...peonies. I am, already, anxiously awaiting peony season. :)

new things.

In the past, I didn't shop at Express because, to be honest, their styles seem most likely to flatter only a tiny waif of a woman...and that I am not (view hips above as evidence). But, I'd spotted this top and was in love with it's sweetheart-ish neckline. So, I snatched it in three colors and headed off to the fitting room.

Suddenly, the sales associate who greeted me was throwing piles of dresses, jeans and tops over the fitting room door saying, "I just grabbed a few things I thought would look great on you..." At first I thought she'd mistaken me for another shopper...but everything was in my size, so, I graciously accepted the pile and went to town trying things on...I wound up having such a blast! Sometimes it takes a stranger to push you outside of your fashion comfort zone. The scariest thing that happened in the fitting room was this dress. The funniest thing? A pair of size 6 jeans. Through friendly giggles I told her that she had to be smoking something and requested a comfortable size 10.

Eventually I settled on the Editor Crop jeans, black and white versions of this cami and an adorable cardigan. Cannot wait for the temps to hit the 50's so I can wear these pants...a perfect blend of comfort and class!

simply sweet.

Silly, but true: The structure for this photo was inspired by a recent tea cup photo over at Swell Life.

Gotta give credit where credit is due...so, thanks for the inspiration, Jess! :)

When I was just a little squirt, my mom shopped at a discount bread store for our weekly carb needs. We'd wind through the scattered rows of the cramped store which smelled like yeast and cardboard, my mom tossing marked-down Wonderbread and discount buns into the squeaky, wonky-wheeled cart. After an agonizing length of time, we'd finally reach my Mecca: two shelves rife with Ding-dongs, Twinkies, Swiss Cake Rolls...every Hostess snack imaginable. Sometimes, when a few extra cents miraculously appeared in the budget, my sweet mother would allow me to pick out one single-packaged treat.

I always chose a Hostess Cupcake. Without fail. Something about that flirty loop of frosting...I just couldn't resist.

I'd not eaten one of these in about a decade and a half...but tonight, eating this sweet treat takes me back to such a beautiful time. A time in which I was a little girl full of crazy, far-fetched dreams, a time when Mommy knew everything, and Daddy was the strongest man in the world.

Hmm...my mom continues to know everything, and my dad remains pretty darn strong. And...I'm still a girl full of just-as-far-fetched dreams. So, I'm certain the only thing that's changed in the last 15 years is the size of these cupcakes. Is it just me, or did they used to be larger?

What gives? :)

just popping in.

Sometimes, in the afternoon, I sit passively in my office, at my desk and look down at my paint-stained, charcoal-covered hands. Suddenly, I realize how very much they are out of place. Whew. Do you ever have those weeks, months in which you're not entirely certain you can continue with the same journey? Although it's been a blessed journey surrounded by fantastic individuals...the journey itself isn't fulfilling you, and beyond that...is actually draining you of the creative energy your soul needs?

I'd been feeling this for the past few months, but it wasn't so heavy on my heart until last week when at work I was assigned the job of photographing fifteen handmade children's toys and writing up light, sunny crafting instructions. It was such a stark contract to the unindividualized type of work that normally fills my days...for an entire day I wasn't even phased that my computer had crashed and that I was closing in on a 50 hour work week while also juggling a robust week at school. All I could think of was crafting, snapping shots and weaving cheery how-to scripts...creating something with such a bright visual purpose.

I was in heaven. A more cluttered, stressful heaven...but heaven none-the-less.

Sometimes I think crazy thoughts. I think about moving somewhere far away, throwing myself fully into school, living off the income of your basic college student job (helllooo, retail job) plus some student loans. I think about flourishing as an individual while having the energy to experience life, school and personal projects with a creatively rejuvenated heart and mind.

Let me just clarify that I say none of this from an ungrateful heart. I'm so thankful to have a job, and beyond that, a job with people I love and with gracious pay and benefits. But even in my thankfulness, I wonder if the type and structure of my job negatively impacts my education and creativity. I wonder if all this is felt...and if I'm doing the agency for which I work and my so-loved co-workers an enormous disservice by sticking around if my heart and mind aren't truly cut out for the mission and work style.

Maybe this is all just spring fever... :)