eating for two.

Did I get your attention? Great. Cause I've been eating for two and I might look pregnant.

Oh, wait. Not pregnant. I'm just in love.

But, incase you're new around here: I've got a boy in my life. He's wonderful. He comes in three week waves, a few times a year, on leave from Iraq. Yet this I've noticed: The more days I spend with him, the more weight I gain. After we met in August, and spent three non-stop weeks globetrotting together, it was a comfortable eight pounds. A little frightening, yes, but I stayed calm. After we reunited for another three weeks in January...another eight pounds have crept back.

It's certainly not his fault he that can eat whatever he'd like, and not gain an ounce. It's not his fault that ordering appetizers and dessert is second nature, or that the food he leaves on his plate just happens to be my kryptonite. But I'm not sure how to handle cooking and eating for two.  It's not as if I can say,

"Darling, I know you spend 330 days a year in Iraq. Eating terrible food, living in sandy hell. But you see: I have no self control and therefore request you eat only salads in my presence."

The man is a saint. If he'd like to bring home an enormous red velvet cake, he certainly deserves it...and a quart of vanilla ice cream. But after he leaves, the cake lingers as does my reignited taste for caloric indulgences. For now these temptations only come in three week quakes, but the month-long aftershock contributes to the weight gain. I'm planning to be with him for some time, so I must get a handle on eating for two before I've had to discard my entire wardrobe in exchange for larger jeans and a dissatisfied countenance.

Advice needed: What are your secrets to creating a food-safe zone when sharing your life with a guy, roommate, friend, etc. who doesn't battle weight gain? (Or lack of self control?)

And for heaven's sake...please tell me I'm not the only one who's fallen victim to love weight.

Tomorrow: Part II of my battle of the bulge.


  1. JEGs makes a nightly habit of eating a sugary snack every night. Usually cookies.

    I have no will power and if in my line of sight, I will eat them.

    So we start a "contraband shelf". It's the third shelf in our cabinets that I cannot reach without a step ladder (or my 'midget stool' as he calls it).

    This works because in the time it takes for me to retrieve the stool from the wash closet, drag it over to the cabinet, open it and climb up it, I have talked myself out of why I would want to eat such horrible, fatty foods.

    There are those times where I don't think. I just act. and 20 minutes later the bag of Lays is g.o.n.e.


  2. ah, definitely not the only one! i think food is a love language! :) but lucky for me, tony has the same metabolism i do, so when he gains, i gain - and we help each other get back on track... so luckily i don't have to deal with a red velvet cake walking through the door - bc i seriously couldn't stop myself! i hope you find a way to deal with it - we'll keep supporting you! :)

  3. I pretty much have zero will power when it comes to snacky foods around the house. So we've come to an agreement that he hides all his treats from me and I try my best not to look for them. Also it has helped in the past to just talk it out with him and he has been very encouraging and at least in the short term does his best to not offer giant delivery pizzas and ice cream sundays until I'm back to my comfort zone.

  4. Instead of indulging in a dessert or treat at night, I instead make a cup of tea or coffee. It keeps me busy and it gives me something to hold onto so my hands don't end up the chip bag!

  5. So sweet. :) But how difficult to be away for so much of the year! I hope his time in Iraq is brief, in the scheme of things, so you two can be reunited soon. And I'd say the weight gain is a minor sacrifice for a great love, right??

    (but for the record, I've been on a health craze the past week and a half cause my clothes are getting way too tight!)

  6. i usually have a really healthy (fiber & protein packed) breakfast and lunch, and then i eat what my husband eats for dinner, just a smaller portion. i'm still a little chubby but we joined a gym awhile ago and it seems to (almost) balance out. we just don't keep red velvet cake, cookies, etc in the house. if it was here, i'd eat it.

  7. Both me and Brendan have put on weight since we moved in together, I think we just got a little too comfortable. Now we just make an effort to only bring healthy food into the house so its not there to tempt us. If we want a treat we have to go and get it, and its only enough for one serve.

  8. I have no advice on this one - but am interested in reading everyone else's - some good tips here.

  9. I think I just go along with it :) We always have a hot Milo at night and a lot of the time we have mint chocolate biscuits with it.

    So I'm not sure how to deal with it :(

    And thank you with the compliment about the black dress. Unfortunately I bought this from my work (Myer department store) and I bought it nearly two years ago (I wore it for engagement photos). Hopefully you could find something similar. x

  10. My night-time snack is a Granny Smith apple sliced up and sprinkled with cinnamon, and a cup of tea. It sort of has an apple-pie-ish-ness to it... Sort of.

    Am married to a man who eats DQ Blizzards all the time and doesn't gain an ounce. Life is cruel!

  11. Glorious love weight! After I married my husband, I gained a healthy 25 lbs- but I blame this on his homemade cakes and cookies.

    We decided to get fit together- changing our eating habits and buying cook books together and now our date nights are like mini Food Network shows. It's great fun and we've been able to shed the pounds. But you've got to allow yourself a cheat day or at least something sweet or savory for a reward. Even though the pieces got smaller, I've never denied myself a piece of cake. It's cake! Delish!

    Good luck sweets. I know you'll find a happy medium that works best for you & your honey.

  12. I have a similar situation- my husband actually loses weight when he doesn't work out and eat healthy. I, on the other hand, find it. I try to be the one to buy our groceries as much as possible or go with him when he does. I bought a whole wheat baking book so that when we do make delicious carbohydrate laden goodies, at least it is whole wheat. It is the only cookbook I use regularly:


    I strongly recommend the Geneen Roth book Breaking Free From Emotional Eating. She has some great tips for navigating potentially problematic food situations. Of all the diet/etc. books that I have read, this one stands out. It deals with the issues behind the urge to binge and how to overcome them.


    Junk food is just as unhealthy for your man as it is for you, no matter how low his body fat %. He might not gain weight, but as a man he is as prone and often more prone to diet-related degenerative diseases, heart conditions, cholesterol problems, etc. This is not just for you.

    Have a serious talk with him about your struggle with food, if you have not already. I was surprised when my husband related to me after such a talk that he would rather not have junk food around either.

  13. So you eat when you're happy too, huh? Sigh! Love hurts. ;)

  14. Both my husband and I have to be of the mentality of not having anything 'bad' in the house sadly. It is the only way we don't give in, that combined with living out in the middle of no-where is the only way we resist.

    When we do give in though he gains weight so much slower than I do, which is super frustrating.

    PS: I sent a little diddy Valentines package your way just over a week ago, hope it makes its way to you safe and sound.

  15. I know i am completely behind as this was posted in February and it is now almost Christmas - however i was just flicking through your blog and this post made me giggle. I can totally relate. My fiance works away also, and has just returned from a 3 month stint away. Suddenly my gym visiting, healthy eating routine is out of the window! We only see each other a few months of the year so its hard to tear yourself away after a long day of work to sweat it out at the gym. And wine filled nights in front of the TV with takeaway is just oh so tempting.
    All in all i have no advice to give, just letting you know you're definitely not alone with this one.

  16. Totally random question months and months later...but what font is that? Thanks, loving your blog!


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