2.16.2011

the proverbial honeymoon is over.



We've loving titled Gabriel's last trip home: The Point In Which We Lost All Mystery. Unlike normal budding relationships, in which unsavory parts of personality, self and life can be concealed through a glitzy veil of formal dates, high heels and passage of time, long distance relationships do not allow such luxury.

Don't misread me: it's not that I dislike it. I mean to say: It's quiet different. For us, it's three weeks spent together...non-stop. In sickness and in health. Dolled up and in lumpy pajamas. Through jet lag and broken suitcases. When spending 500 undivided hours together, the realities of day-to-day life tend to tumble out...hiding any unpleasantries is nearly impossible. During our last trip,  we had our first fight, I was sick twice, he saw me multiple times without make up, we washed laundry together while I cringed about the reality of it all and we bickered over directions.

It's rather like three weeks of marriage. Not at all like normal dating, but the truth is: I rather love it. Having a partner, I adore, even during those anything-but-romantic moments. And  afterall, he did do the laundry...and although I loathe the idea of a man washing my skivvies, I was pleasantly surprised by his willingness to housekeep.

We've embraced our mystery-free relationship, and cringe much less at those earth-shattering moments of reality...often teasing each other with a:

"Babe? Are you ready to kiss our very last bit of mystery goodbye? Here goes..."

------

Do you remember that moment...the one in which you knew you'd crossed into reality, and most all mystery was gone from your relationship? Do tell.

8 comments:

  1. I'm still surprised by Bria...

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  2. I've never actually made it that far - but you make it sound like a very good place to be.

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  3. I don't think we had an exact moment. To begin with, we met in band in early high school and that means lots of fieldshows with no make up and lots of sweat. That helps keep things honest. Still, no pinpoint. We live together now and have been together for years and I know that at least for the last four we've been nothing but honest. It's refreshing - to have that person in your life you can be honest with but know that they'll love you through it all. I think I agree with you - I'd rather jump right into that part of the relationship. That's when it's real.

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  4. hee hee. we were on a road trip with two of my girlfriends and Stace asked James if he had farted in front of me yet as that is a true test of a relationship. He hadn't, but he wanted to make sure we were "in" so he farted the rest of the trip. in the car. with three girls.

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  5. I would have to say after my car wreck. I stayed at Sean's house for a month (didn't get out of bed for two weeks). So, frankly... I was gross. I needed him, and he was there 100% for me.

    It was during that time that I saw he was the one for me :)

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  6. It was weird for us after we got married. We dated forever- but then the real life of living together got dragged out. We worked in Sweden 2 weeks after we got married for a month straight and were gone all summer- so it was 3 months into our marriage before we got to see a normal day to day routine. I remember being surprised by the little routines and quirks and thinking it was funny that it took so long to see them.

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  7. I don't remember an actual moment. We've been together 11 years now, and there's no mystery at all! Any mystery that was left was lost when he watched me have two c-sections. You look inside someone's guts and I guess it just changes you!

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  8. You know, I dont think we ever had that exact moment. Our relationship was always marked by 48 continuous hours spent together every week.

    Maybe it was when we moved in together and I finally realized that it was his grandmother who was picking up those abandoned socks around the house-- not JEGs ;)

    LB

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