(Me, celebrating some curvature.)
My mother asked me to make something clear, as she currently fears for her life: she had nothing to do with these tasteless comments about my weight + my wedding. Lest the angry mob come searching for someone to pay for my emotional stress, she needs it known that her hands are clean!!
I couldn't stop laughing when she pointed this out. While rabble rousing wasn't what I aimed to do, I had to smile over all the comments...both those that offered emotional support and those that offered a more physical approach to dealing with the unsavory comments. It was like having one pissed off older brother, ready to tackle whomever had hurt his little sis.
Or, I imagine that's what it was like. I'm brotherless. Regardless, thank you. To everyone who dropped encouraging words + funny solutions: your time and thoughts were so appreciated. A handful of them made me cry. Many of them made me giggle. And some of them made me think. A few of them did all three. I treasured each word. Truly, I did.
After reading my post, a few girlfriends pulled me aside to reason with me to not lose weight before the wedding. They each made the same positive point: When I look back at my wedding photos, I want to see me...not some sad, shell of a girl who whittled away months trying to fit into a size 2 gown...and still isn't happy with herself. Rock those healthy curves, they said, rather than show up to the big day looking not like me.
They're right. Currently, I'm the smallest I've been in my adult life. I should embrace and celebrate it! And so for now, I'm making healthy efforts to take care of my bod, little things to help me feel beautiful: At 25, I've finally established a skin-care regiment. I've stopped dying my hair. I've incorporated exercise into my routine at least four times a week. I've almost completely cut out soda, and have welcomed drinking 10 glasses of water a day. I even have an electric toothbrush, cause you've gotta take care of that smile.
And most importantly, tending to my emotional health: I'm learning to believe I can be beautiful, just as I am. No matter what size.
Whew. That's a big one.